Long time no thoughts

Hi!

Its been some time. My obsessive days of over analyzing everything have come to an easing slow pace, as in I’m proud to say after all the years of reading and “studying” everything about life, and then over thinking it way too much, I am finally calm and can move passed the fact that everything is just so weird and confusing lol, hence the reasoning I’m not on “social” media anymore and don’t write much anymore.

Yet, I’m clearly here for a reason lol and I’m bored at work.

Lately I’ve just been thinking about how strange, there’s that word again, it is that we seem to live in a reality where the majority of people are actually going about their days without ever really thinking, without questioning anything. Whether it be how they treat others, how they act, their responsibilities etc etc people just seem to be like a toy car thrown by a child, speeding off a counter, without knowing how far they are from having control of anything.

Here is a really basic example of the grand scheme of the issue.

I worked with this black lady, who hardly worked, sat around, called in all the time, talked back and argued with everyone and had a bad attitude all around. One day she got fired, this chick had the nerve to holler ” RACISM!”

Never seeing that it was her the whole time who was first off racist for assuming such things, and second completely negligent of her responsibilities.

Or what about the guy I knew who was always in and out of fights and jail, stealing selling drugs etc etc, yet always wondered why his life was so bad.

Or the girl who said a million things and her actions never matched with words that came out of her mouth. The girl who wondered why I ran as fast as I could away from her. The girl who was so confused that I “couldn’t commit”. Lol the girl who robbed me and said ” YOU ruined MY life”

Oh ya

I had this thought because someone asked me the other day why that Bruce Jenner or whatever guy is getting so much attention for His sex change thing.

Though I believe that its cool he did what he wanted and felt inside, should he deserve more spotlight than anyone else who has done something?

Na

But we live in this world full of fog where everyone is blind and just moving, like zombies and robots, and all the words people use to describe “dumbed down”.

They watch TVs and care so much about this act that is media, like any of it matters AT ALL. As tabloids and magazines are filled with bullshit pooh pooh like who is cheating on who, who has some secret something, people are gobbling it up like Honey boo boos mom in a buffet line.

Its just.. Yup strange that I do judge when I speak or hear someone talking and its like they are not even noticing how they are talking or what they are puking out of their mouths, like fucking cavemen.

Do I seem angry or mean?
I’m not at all, but this is how I feel inside, I don’t walk around telling these people how stupid they are, well maybe there have been one or two times I have lol

I dont want to call people retarded, stupid, slow, asleep, not conscious.. Well, fuck it I just did. Lol

– Trev Train

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Love behind the eyes

I thought this was worth reblogging

The Book Of Trev

Love and life

I talk a lot of shit,and I know I often go on negative rants.

But….

I, as many people,shift my perspective often ( To much I might add).

I go through man thoughts about relationships.

“Its holding me back, why commit to one person, should this one be my last and always, is it worth it, will I be better off, or stronger, as a single person?” Etc etc.

And then here I am,single,and that’s not a sob story it just places me in a different perspective.

When all is said and done, when the Facebook rants are done,when the negative justifications fade away, I am here with how I feel deeply,and truly,without the mask.

I’m not a partier, I do not want to live a polyamorous lifestyle, contrary to my sexual posts,I don’t sleep around, and honestly, I don’t want to.

So I keep coming back…

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Huh

Strange daze, everyday im amazed
Everyday I feel crazed, so I write on a page
Its a little like a symphony the way the words get into me
I try too hard at fame to make a name, who’s into me
Like Im living in a prison without shackles in a kitchen with no knives, no tools, cut up inside an image
I just move with the wind, no telling how Ill feel
No telling if Ill be able to deal with the real when I keel
Am I happy, kinda, when the world seems brighter
Im broke as a joke, eating ramon on a type writer.

The strangest part

Through everything

Through all the studying and researching life and life after death,spirituality etc etc, there is one thing I think I have come to that I stand firm on.

No one really knows what’s going on here, this place. We ALL, me, YOU, all of us have these boxes and thoughts that just give us feelings to keep going and smiling.

Smiling is good, happy is good.

But its so strange that we are here, now, pooping,sexting, texting, working, sleeping, and we have no idea why lol

As I always say

Something IS going on here, something supernatural, but I don’t think its meant to be figured out.

Just look at all of the millions of firm “only truths” that there are

Lol that alone should make you laugh, and we keep going about our days believing that shit hahhah. Yet we have to believe in something, to give ourselves a reason to have a reason, a reason to strive for a better something.

A reason to smile, we all like that.

Maybe that’s my only religion, smile, I believe in that shit